April 27, 06

Today I am very angry.
I don't believe that there has been a time when I was more angry than I am now. The cause of this I believe to be a single source however, you the reader that has no other better to do right now should know all of the sources so that you can make a more informed opinion of these events. Possible reasons for me to be angry today: My computer is not working correctly and will cut in and out. The pressure of prom in about a week could be getting to me. It may have something to do with the fact that I am attempting to start a relationship, but that seems unlikely to me. The two hours of homework that I had tonight I didn't understand at all, even though I recognize that I should be able to do what it is asking. LHS AP Chem / AP Calc is way further ahead of Silver creek AP's. So therefore I could have had a better preparation for these tests, and the people that don't get it have held me back. (The only other person I know of that has voiced an opinion about the unbearable slowness of the learning in AP Calc is Diana.) Graduation is coming in 22 days, and if you want you can see that as a source of anger. There are more, but I think that I should move on to the real reason of this post and why I believe I am angry today. Earlier today I was asked one of those questions that the answer not only doesn't matter, but won't even be heard by the one asking. And I didn't feel like answering it. It was a question about my personal life, that though the person asking was socially obligated to ask, was not obligated at all to push the issue until it became one. A single flaw like that is not enough to push me over, I believe this because there are SO many of them that I see everyday and have learned to not focus on. Anywho, after the incident the same family member confronted me and repeatedly asked the same question to which I gave the same answer which I believe answer the question and should advance the conversation to the next question. In case this is the first post you have read of mine. I hate when people repeat things. So after repeating this unnecessary and unimportant question they proceeded to lecture me for no reason. Maybe lecture is not the right word... I believe that they were talking for the sole purpose of hurting me. Their comments were directed at me and offered no solution or help in any way. Repeating things and unnecessary things I do hate a lot however, I hate hurting things for no reason much more. So after they said this very hurtful thing, I thought of many ways to tell them how flawed their live was, and how they could improve their life, not only to help themselves but to help those around them. However, I bit my tongue and let them get away with the attack. So now I am left with way to much homework, and I am super pissed, so I thought of doing all the actions that I condemn others for, but did none of them because I saw no gain in the world if I did do them. Which is it. I believe in making the world better. Everything that is done should have a net good effect. The events today that involved this person did not. And I believe that they intended for them to not. Well, it is sleep time now... I hope nobody reading this is effected outside of this blog by this post.
Again please never talk to me about what is said in here out of this blog...
L8R-- Michael

"Joy in the thought of control." --Me
"I can see advantages to knowing everything" --Me
"Because that is part of everything and I can see advantages in knowing everything..." --Me
"Intellectual backflips" --Me

I may add to this and I may not...
These are all original quotes.
No taking them... (especially the first one)
L8R-- Michael